okay, so it occurred to me almost 3 weeks ago after seeing this victoria secret’s ad…
i’m a fatty.
i know a lot of people (okay, a lot of women) look at these models and think these girls are unhealthy little rails and that no real woman should want to look like that, but daggone it years ago that was me! i was the skinny chick! the one that could pick up anything in a store and know for sure it would fit. and look pretty good in it too.
and do you know that i even had the audacity to be on a “get fat” diet at one point in my life? sure did!! i was eating bread and drinking protein shakes like nobody’s business trying to gain weight.
but there’s no need to “get fat” now. i’ve got it honestly. and it’s nobody’s fault but my own. after i gave birth to my son five and a half years ago i did absolutely nothin’ to lose weight. unless you count nursing and that actually did help some, but i didn’t exercise a lick.
so now i’m finally fed up with my fatty-ness. in fact, i know that if i don’t tame jelly (my wanting to eat every piece of junk/fried food in sight alter ego) i will forever have this muffin top. it ain’t cute. jelly’s got to go ’cause she’s not wanted here no mo’!
i’ve signed up to my fitness pal thanks to my cousin who recommended it to me and i’ve been counting calories like a mad person. i’ve also been going to the gym. okay, so i’ve only been to the gym a couple times BUT i’ve been exercising with the wii. and that counts, right? i almost bought a yoga dvd the other day until i remembered on demand on my verizon fios. why pay for a dvd when i have access to fitness tv?!
and that’s what brings me to cat chiarelli (of crunch gym/exercisetv fame). you see, i found her sexy stretch workout and figured i’d give it a go. i mean, a sista needs to stretch and why not add a little sexy to it, right?
i did great in the beginning and then started to fall apart just lil’ bit closer to the end and when cat did this…
honey, it was a wrap!! you see that?? this child’s leg is straight over her head and her daggone foot is hittin’ the floor! what in the hairy hay?
thank goodness that part came close to the tail end because i was some kinda frustrated. to cat’s credit, it’s not like she said put your foot over your head. she said do your best or some mess to make us stiffies feel better about ourselves.
all i gotta say is girl, you know you have to show off like that! now i’m determined to master this workout. i probably will never ever be able to get my leg over my shoulder. (i mean, really, can you? never mind, don’t answer that ’cause if you can i’ll just be even more jealous.) but i can get close.
or at least sorta close.