he wants me to procreate

it’s august?! already?? geesh, the time is whizzing on by. new month = new thangs. first thang up, to get my butt back on track with this blog. i follow awesomely luvvie on instagram and she issued a challenge to bloggy types to post every day for the month of august. perfect! i likes a challenge. so here goes.

dutch has always come up with suggestions for me: “mom, you should cut your hair,” “mom, you should buy hot buns,” “mom, you need to exercise,” “mom, you should get a job at my school library,” “look mom, the gas station is hiring, don’t you need a job?”

his life coaching lessons are endless, but his latest suggestion just took the whole entire cake of cakes.

mama's got moxie

just the other day we were riding home from a little trip to baskin robbins because i needed a scoop of jamoca almond fudge to brighten my day and here’s how our conversation went…

dutch: mom, do you know what procreate means?

mama: (cringing more than a little bit…) yes.

oh…here we go. the “where do babies come from” talk. i was panicking on the inside because i’m just not ready for the procreation convo with my almost 8-year-old child, especially when my husband isn’t present.

dutch: good. can you please go procreate because i really want to have a little brother or sister.

good?!? did this child just say “good”?? like we’re on the same page of understanding? as if he already knows and is just checking to make sure i know? and who on earth says, “go procreate??” who is this child? where did he come from? like, really, where they do that at? oh, but he’s not done yet.

dutch: there was a woman in the Bible who prayed about procreating and she had a baby so can you do that?

wait. what? he wants me to pray on it?

mama: huh? who told you that?

dutch: i learned it in sunday school.

i pulled the car into a parking space and we got out to head into our home. i was walking ahead of dutch, but he stopped for a sec on the sidewalk and said…

“mom, you deserve to procreate.”

dusted off my sewing machine

actually, i didn’t.

i was so geeked off of my idea to make a denim clutch that i didn’t even bother to dust the thing off. i was also so geeked that i didn’t bother to use the zipper foot for my sewing machine to put in the zipper.

can i just say here that i hate hate hate sewing in zippers for some reason? they were the most painful thing for me to do in school when i studied fashion design 50 million years ago.

but that wasn’t the end of my geeked-ness. nope, sure wasn’t. i also didn’t realize my interfacing was double-sided adhesive before i ironed the thing down. that meant that my lining was sticking to the inside of the bag, which just wasn’t going to work. i worked around it, but it turned out a little errrrrr…bulkier than i had planned.

see, sometimes i get so stoked about an idea that i just jump right on in.

yes, i goes in, honey.

full throttle all like, “today is clutch day!!!!!”

handmade denim clutch

handmade denim clutch

handmade denim clutch

it’s pretty needless to add here that my clutch had some bumps along the way, but i think it came out rather snazzy for my first go at it.

 

would my son be my hero?

dutch is 7. at 7 you don’t have very many responsibilities. you clean up after yourself. keep your room clean. do well in school. behave. you know, it just doesn’t get very deep at 7. you basically go to school and look forward to the weekend so you can chill out, watch cartoons, play around. life is easy breezy.

in dutch’s case, the weekend includes video game time. he lives for his video game time and he has quite a collection of games. naturally, there are some games (his dad’s) that are a definite no-no. that includes anything rated “m” for mature. he’s not even allowed to be in the same room when his dad plays these games.

we’re serious.

my child

so last weekend we were hanging around the house. i was watching tv, dutch was playing his games, and i hadn’t fixed anything for lunch just yet so i decided to just order chinese. by the time the food came i was out of my mind hungry and couldn’t wait to dig in. i said to dutch, “i’m going to pass out in here if i don’t eat soon!” which got me to thinking, would my child know what to do if i ever had a medical emergency and really passed out?

so i asked, “dutch, what would you do if i passed out?”

dutch: play call of duty: black ops.

mama: what?!

dutch: and then i’d call an ambulance.

so much for a hero.