Tag Archives: 5-year-old

all dyed out

so since dutch’s t-ball practice was rained out, i figured, let’s dye our Easter eggs!! fun, right? well, not exactly. first of all, as soon as we walked through the door from spring break camp, he’s like, i’m ready to dye the eggs now!! hol’ up there, buddy. the eggs haven’t even been boiled yet!

i told him to just wait a minute and that we’d start soon. so then i go into the bathroom and here he comes knocking at the door (like always), “mom, i’ve got the eggs!!!”

oh boy.

what in the world? i told him to put them back and i’d be out in a minute to boil them. then i hear him fall…with the eggs.


i ask, “dutch, did you break the eggs?” dutch: i didn’t break them! “dutch, did you check the eggs?” dutch: i didn’t check them but i’m pretty sure they didn’t break.

yeah, okay.

two were cracked. not a big deal. i had bought two dozen. so i boil the eggs and prepare dinner at the same time and tell dutch that we have to eat dinner first. that’s when the break down happened. “why do we alwaysssssssss have to eat first when we come home? why can’t we do other things first?!! like watch tv.”

i save my whole speech about how there are starving children in the world because really, i just don’t even feel like giving a speech. instead i stew a little bit in my annoyed-ness ’cause see i have a bad habit of imagining how a particular activity will go and when it doesn’t go that way and things get all funky, well, mama ain’t too happy with that.

can you blame me though? dyeing eggs is supposed to be fun! not a whine-fest. so yeah, i get annoyed. i’m tired, i don’t want to dye eggs anymore. but i proceed anyway because i mean, really, i’m in too deep at this point to change the course of the evening.

i barely read the instructions, realize that i hadn’t bought what i thought i bought (like the little egg holder thingy, it was just an egg holder thingy…no dye, no nothing). and since i didn’t really read the directions the eggs don’t quite come out looking like the ones on the box, you know, with this whole marble look. instead they just look kinda…blah.

then dutch cracks two more eggs. dye is all over the table and instead of using the little hook thingy, he uses his fingers to get the eggs out and dye is just…well, everywhere. we fuss back and forth about when to take the eggs out of the egg holder dryer thingy. i think i care too much about egg dryness. i mean, really, do the eggs have to be thoroughly dry before we move them to the tupperware-ish bowl. probably not. so i wave my surrender flag, or rather the blue rag that i was using to sop up dye from the table. put the eggs wherever you wish, dear son.

but i have to give a strong no when dutch says, “okay, after all these eggs are dry, we’re going to put them in my room.”

sick again? well, not quite

kindergarten is making my child sick. literally. he first got sick just a couple months after starting school.

he had a nasty little bug otherwise known as strep. so we got some antibiotics (and tons of popsicles) and knocked that sucka clean out.

only to have it come right back after two months.

my child has never been this sick…ever. i feel like i need to send him to school in one of those all white germ free suits with a mask and four cans of lysol. i mean, really, school = cess pool of icky germs. and the kids just pass it back and forth and forth and back like a game of hot potato.

so anyway yesterday around 3pm i get yet another call while at work from the clinic at dutch’s school. yeah, they don’t call it the nurse’s office anymore. it’s now called the “clinic.” dutch had a temperature of 101. come get him now, they said. good thing his dad had taken off early for an appointment so he was able to get him right away.

sidenote: my child must’ve really been out of it because he thought that the nurse said it would take me a while to get there to pick him up because i was coming from africa. yeah, africa. is this what a fever does to a little child’s brain?

but back to my lil’ story. when the husband got there he was told there was a nasty bug going around (no kidding) and that in order for dutch to return to school he would have to be feverless for 24 hours. “he won’t be coming to school tomorrow,” said the nurse to the husband.

so now i’m here with a feverless child who is trying his best to keep himself occupied while i work from home. he decided to check out the balance of his piggy bank account and surmised that he has enough money for us to go somewhere. “let’s go!! we can go anywhere!!”

anywhere? not quite kid.

and the only pain he now feels is in his foot. from jumping around playing wii.

apparently i’dda been on the bus

this morning dutch was flipping through a book about dr. martin luther king that he had gotten from his school library. he stopped and pointed to a picture of people on a bus and here’s the conversation that followed:

dutch: see, the brown people couldn’t get on the bus. me and daddy wouldn’t have been able to get on the bus but you would. [in the book the whites were illustrated on the bus while the blacks stood outside of the bus.]

mama: well, why do you think that?

dutch: you would because you’re white.

pump the brakes. my child thinks i’m white.

i guess that when he compares my skin color to his skin color then yes, i probably do seem a bit white. or peach as he usually calls me. it’s all good. i used to refer myself to peach as a kid too. it the crayola crayon color that i matched best.

lightskinnned. red bone. yellow girl. zebra. oreo. high yella. light bright. reds. i’ve been considered it all, but never white. and i definitely don’t think this high yella lightskinned red bone would’ve been able to pass back in the day.

so yes, we’re definitely in need of a skin color conversation, but not today. i just had four wisdom teeth pulled.

the mean mommy

i’m sure we’ve all had moments when we’ve thought our moms are just plain ol’ mean. and silly me to think that i had somehow dodged the dreadful “mean” title. after all, for the last 5 years i’ve been the good mommy, but lately, not so much.

last night i was cooking and dutch wanted to help. he helped pour the orange marmalade and then he poured some water in a pot, but then i ran out of things for him to pour! when i told him i’d take it from there he got upset and told me i was mean.

dutch: you’re such a mean mommy! you think you’re a beautiful girl, but you’re really just a mean girl!

funny how he somehow equated mean with not so beautiful. i hope he remembers that when he starts dating.


dutch visits the library once a week at school and he usually picks the same types of books. either they’re about the military or football or pirates. he recently brought home a book about the marines and after we finished reading it I asked a few questions about the book.

mama: so where do the marines live, dutch?

dutch: at a place that has schools, and stores, and big buildings.

mama: okay, but what is it called? (mind you, the answer is a military base.)

dutch: georgetown?