Tag Archives: black moms

i really do belong to my mama

it’s been an interesting ride being a mixed chick. i’m darker than my pop and lighter than my mama so there’s always a bit of confusion going on as far as exactly who i am to these two folks.

for instance, while my mama was sitting in the hospital bed after giving birth to me she was waiting for the nurse to bring me back from the nursery when she noticed that the nurse stopped right at her door with a newborn in tow. the nurse then slowly moved on after taking one look at my brown mama, and then one look at little white ol’ me. my mama yelled for the nurse to come back and after a few wristband checks, it was determined that this little white baby, did indeed belong to this brown woman.

the second case of confusion happened when my pop decided to take a crew of 8- and 9-year-old girls (me, my cousins and girlfriends) to an amusement park called king’s dominion that’s located right outside of the dc metropolitan area. just imagine a cool white guy with a band of brown little girls in every hue. i’m sure all kinds of assumptions were made that day. my pop told me years later that when we stopped for a quick bathroom break a woman walked over to him and said how wonderful she thought it was that he would pick up children from an orphanage and take them out for a day at king’s dominion. oh, the nerve… well, naturally my pop set her straight on that one.

then there was the time when i was 11 or 12 and i entered a community beauty pageant. my pop and uncle jay (my pop’s best buddy who’s also white) came through to show their support. but of course, the pageant’s organizers didn’t assume that one of them could actually be a parent of one of the girls. oh no. the organizers thought my pop and uncle jay were there to report on the event for a local newspaper.

as if.

when i was in my late teens my pop and i were at the mall when we were mistaken by a coworker of his as being a couple. the comment to my pop was along the lines of, “hey, nice going…”

then there was the time my pop went with me to get my car repaired (you know, to make sure i didn’t get ganked and taken for every little penny i owned) and the mechanic thought we were married.

my mother and i have even been mistaken as a lesbian couple. twice!

i find all of this stuff pretty interesting and funny to say the least. people always jump to conclusions about other people, but you never really know what’s going on in people’s lives unless you know them.

but i’m not going to sit here and play innocent when it comes to guessing about folks. i remember when my son was about five or six months old and my husband and i heard an unexpected knock at the door. my husband went to the door and after i asked him who it was he responded, “i dunno…some white chick.”

indeed, it was our blond, light eyed neighbor who lives in the next building. after i went over to open the door for her she laughed and said, “i heard him say, ‘some white chick.'” i kinda cringed from embarrassment, but she took it all in stride as she handed us a few things for our new baby that had been gently used by her own son who is just a few months older than dutch.

over time my neighbor and i have become closer. our sons play together while our husbands sit back and talk smack about which football team is the best. one day my son and i were visiting their place when she pulled out a picture of her dad and i was in total shock.

her dad was a full-blood native american with warm brown skin.

so hey, you just never really know, do you?