Tag Archives: dutch

never been a football fan ’til now

football. i’ve never been a fan of the sport. never paid any attention to any particular team, never cared who made it to the playoffs. at high school football games i chatted up my girlfriends the entire time and barely glanced over at the field. when i got older and hung out at sports bars with friends it was mainly just to socialize. for me, anyway.

i wouldn’t know a cornerback from the quarterback. a tight end from a wide receiver. as a matter of fact, i just found out recently how many points a team gets for a touchdown.

superbowl? child, please… surely, there’s something else on besides these grown men in tight pants barreling each other down and chasing a ball up and down a field.

but now that dutch is playing, everything has changed. i’m HYPE!! you hear me?? i’m all into some football.

i’m sure i’ve driven my husband nuts with all my crazy football questions like, “wait, did the coach just say they can grab ankles in a tackle?? that’s allowed??!!”

dutch and my husband looking over in my direction.

dutch played his first game last weekend and there i was yelling at the top of my lungs up and down the sidelines, as if i really knew what the heck i was talking about.

well, yelling and half listening to other parents comment on the game so maybe i could learn a thing or two.

all i know for sure is if the other team has the ball, we need to tackle whoever is running with it to stop him. and if we have the ball we need to be getting to the goal line.

it is called a goal line, right?

clearly, the correct wording doesn’t matter to a mama cheering for her son and his team. shoot, i still don’t know offense from defense. didn’t realize until someone informed me that when i kept yelling to that child last saturday to keep running the ball that he actually couldn’t because he had gotten a flag for some reason unbeknownst me.

all i know is that when the coach has the kids in a huddle and he’s yelling, “how y’all feel?” and the kids shout back, “FIRED UP!!” i’m feeling pretty fired up too. excited about this sport that i never would’ve imagined in a million years that i’d be amped about.

no, i really don’t know what the heck is going on, but what i do know is dutch’s first game was the best game i’ve ever seen. and i can’t wait until the next one.

boom!!

dirty

football practice pants. they get pretty daggone filthy with all that mud, dirt and grass stained all over them. i’m sure they’re funky too. i wouldn’t know because when i’m carrying them to the washing machine i tend to keep them an arm’s distance away from my nose.

one day recently before practice, i handed dutch his bright and sparkly white football pants (thanks to my handy dandy stain stick) and he said to me, “mom, you washed them??” ummmm, yeah. then he added, “they’re supposed to be dirty.”

hmmm…i guess that’s item #174 on my list of things i don’t know about football. the pants are supposed to be dirty. check!

 

my labor day gift

labor day will always hold a special little spot in my heart since my dutchie was born on that day. i’d never tell him that i secretly celebrate his birthday twice a year (his actual birthday is september 5th) because then he’d expect two gifts, two parties, two cakes…you get where i’m going with this, right?

so today i’ll just sit back quietly and think on the day my sweet baby boy was born. *whispering* happy birthday, dutchie!! 🙂

dutchisms: am i american?

so this evening my dear 6yo son dutch had a question for me…

dutch: mom, am i american?

mama: no, dutch, you’re japanese (because honestly, i thought it was a pretty ridiculous question, since he knows he’s american).

dutch: [getting loud & super whiny all of a sudden…] i AM NOT japanese!!!! if i was japanese i would speak SPANISH!!

kids. gotta love ’em.

spelling is in his blood

okay, that title was a bit dramatic, but boy was i one happy mama when i received a letter from dutch’s school stating that he was one of two students in his 1st grade class who qualified for the school spelling bee!

woohoooooooo!!! i was in a couple spelling bees in elementary school and won ribbons so i was pretty dang proud.

then i saw the list of words. since this was a school spelling bee the words weren’t just for 1st graders. in fact, they were 5th thru 8th grade words! the school sent home a list of 450 words to study and it included words like expressionism, extemporaneous, circumloctution, dramaturgy, slantindicular…

what the hairy heck?

we had less than a month to prepare for this thing and honestly, i didn’t even concentrate on the tougher words. for goodness sakes, my child is 6, what does he know about slantindicular?

so we practiced and practiced and initially dutch was excited about the possibility of winning a ribbon, but as the spelling bee drew nearer he said, “mom, i’m not going to win this thing.” i told him that i was proud of him for even making it to the spelling bee at all! my husband and i just wanted him to do his best and to have fun.

the day of the spelling bee, dutch said he wanted to wear his bowtie. and this is not just any ol’ bowtie. it’s a black velvet bowtie, but i love that he wants to do his own thing sometimes and not follow the crowd so i just went with it. we took tons of pictures and he videotaped himself. he was super excited about the day.

as if you couldn’t tell by the pictures. 🙂

my husband and i went to the spelling bee and we were nervous as heck as he stepped up to the mic to spell his first word.

s-c-o-o-p

whew!! they started off with the easy words. i was hoping that he’d at least make it through the first round. score! then came the second round and honey, it was a beast. wiped out most of the 1st graders. dutch stepped to the mic once again…

t-u-r-k-e-y

boom!! all i do is win win win no matter what… yeah, i was dancing in my seat!

there were only two 1st graders left for the third round and dutch was the first up…

t-h-u-r-m-u-s

as if my child knows what a daggone thermos is, but hey, he sounded that sucka out and did the best he could. we were mighty proud of him and his school principal said the same.

and can i just say everyone loved his black velvet bowtie? one teacher said to me, “he might not’ve won the spelling bee, but he definitely wins for most fashionable.”

all i do is win win win no matter what…

cursive words

dutch and i had an interesting little convo recently that went like this…

dutch: when i grow up can i get a cat?

mama: when you grow up you can get whatever you want.

dutch: oh great! when i grow up i can write and say cursive words!!

mama: cursive words?? what do you mean? [knowing full well what he meant, but i wanted to hear him explain himself.]

dutch: you know how you write like this… [“writes” with finger on the on the couch and makes swirls] and i get to SAY cursive words!!

mama: what are cursive words, dutch?

dutch: you know, like the “d” word, the “h” word…

dutch’s dinner drama

dutch is super picky. i mean, super duper picky. it drives me up a wall. i’ve tried everything to get him to eat or at least try different foods, but no dice. here’s our most recent dinner conversation:

mama: you need to eat more than just the chicken on your plate, dutch. you’re getting too skinny!

dutch: i like being skinny.

mama: and why do you like being skinny, dutch?

dutch: because i can fit in the air vents.

mama: and why would you ever need to fit in the air vents, dutch?

dutch: just in case there’s ever a fire or something and i need to get out of the house!

then he went on to sing various songs of his own making:

“i’m so skinny, i can fit through a hole… i’m so skinny i can fit through a hole…”

“i like being, skinny, skinny, skinny, skinny… skinny, skinny, skinny, skinny…”

dutch for mayor 2017

yesterday dutch told me that when he turns 16 he’s running for mayor.

mama: so what will you do when you become mayor?

dutch: i’m going to build another school next to my school called bearhuggers elementary.

i should explain that bearhuggers is a school name that i made up when i was trying to trick dutch at the beginning of the school year by telling him he would be transferring there for the year. but anyway…

mama: okaaaaayyyyy… so what else will you do when you become mayor?

dutch: i’m going to make all the soccer teams colors, instead of states.

so yeah, vote for dutch. in ten years.

yeah…1st grade!!

1st grade. can’t you just see the joy on his face?


he was actually totally excited about his first day of 1st grade. what he wasn’t excited about was holding the green “speech bubble” i made five minutes before this picture was taken.

oh whatever.

so anyway, today he says to me…

“mom, you know if you make yourself invisible in class you will get in trouble and get sent to the principal’s office?”

yep, he came up with that one all on his own.