Tag Archives: family

give a little love inspiration

i’ve been following black and married with kids‘ online and in social media for years. their website is chock full of good information and stories related to black marriage and families. if you’ve done the good deed by jumping the broom, you know how it is. you’ve said the vows, had the party, things are good and then you get to a space where you just plain ol’ don’t know what’s going on with your communication, you’re in a rut and you just can’t figure out how to get things on track again. well, bmwk has produced a few films that are focused on uplifting and inspiring folks to stay the course in marriage and commit to their spouses and children. there’s nothing like knowing someone else understands what you’re going through and got over it.

the black family 4-pack dvd package is now being offered at a discount ($60!) and includes: happily ever after: a positive image of black marriage, you saved me, men ain’t boys and still standing!

blackmarriedwkidsfilmshappily ever after: a positive image of black marriage takes a look at black marriage from inside and outside of the community.

you saved me is a collection of love stories that speak to marital challenges and triumphs.

still standing features kindred the family soul, arrested development’s speech, yolanda thomas and more and shows couples conversing on how they made it through when others have failed.

men ain’t boys offers a look at issues such as stereotypes surrounding manhood, the results of effective fatherhood and the requirements for maintaining lasting love, relationships and marriages.

also, in early 2014 bmwk is offering new year, new marriage, a dvd and workbook set that couples can use at home to strengthen their marriages.

NYNMSet

 

would my son be my hero?

dutch is 7. at 7 you don’t have very many responsibilities. you clean up after yourself. keep your room clean. do well in school. behave. you know, it just doesn’t get very deep at 7. you basically go to school and look forward to the weekend so you can chill out, watch cartoons, play around. life is easy breezy.

in dutch’s case, the weekend includes video game time. he lives for his video game time and he has quite a collection of games. naturally, there are some games (his dad’s) that are a definite no-no. that includes anything rated “m” for mature. he’s not even allowed to be in the same room when his dad plays these games.

we’re serious.

my child

so last weekend we were hanging around the house. i was watching tv, dutch was playing his games, and i hadn’t fixed anything for lunch just yet so i decided to just order chinese. by the time the food came i was out of my mind hungry and couldn’t wait to dig in. i said to dutch, “i’m going to pass out in here if i don’t eat soon!” which got me to thinking, would my child know what to do if i ever had a medical emergency and really passed out?

so i asked, “dutch, what would you do if i passed out?”

dutch: play call of duty: black ops.

mama: what?!

dutch: and then i’d call an ambulance.

so much for a hero.

basketball is his favorite sport…for now

i used to joke with my husband when i was pregnant and say, “watch, i’m going to be that mama involved in everything!!! i’ll be the pta mom, the soccer mom…” i just rolled off a million things that seemed simple to do to a mom who hadn’t yet given birth.

well, i’m not a pta mom. and so far, i haven’t been a soccer mom either. not for a team anyway. we enrolled dutch in a soccer basics activity when he was three, but he was kinda young quite to get the gist of it. first of all, i signed his up for british soccer complete with british coaches. dutch could barely understand them.

we tried tennis too and tee ball, but he really has a passion for football and basketball. he played basketball last spring and we’re seeing lots of improvement in his game already. my husband and i weren’t too sure if he’d want to play again after the last season because soon after his last season he announced, “i’m never playing basketball again. i retired!!!”

but oh…after football season ended, he was ready to play again.

basketball booyahhis team lost their first game of the season by quite a few points, but the next game they came back stronger and it was pretty intense. who knew basketball with a bunch of seven-year-olds could be intense?!!

the game went into overtime and then one of dutch’s teammates scored two points and after that dutch came with another two points to seal the win. there’s nothing like watching your child doing something that he loves, and doing it well to boot!

quite exciting indeed.

 

goodbye 2012!!

wishing you all a blessed and prosperous and joyful and fun and lively and humorous (so good that your bellyaches) and peaceful and loving new year!!

goodbye2012

2012 was an interesting year for me. at times it sucked. and when it sucked, i mean, it really, really sucked. the worst part of it was losing my uncle tony. but i have peace with his passing knowing that he’s not in pain anymore or worried about his blood pressure or any other health issue he was dealing with.  but i sure do love him and miss hearing his voice. seeing his silly grin.

*exhale*

when i think about it there were quite a few good moments in 2012 too. it’s so easy to dwell on all the bad that occurs in your life and not have gratitude for all the good. i mean, dang, every day ain’t bad, right?  so the good: my relationship with my husband has grown by leaps and bounds, my child is healthy and happy and it’s been a blast following him in sports (basketball and football and now basketball again) this year. we went on a family vacation to ft. lauderdale this year, which hasn’t happened in like…forever! quite a few friends turned the big 4-0 and we celebrated a couple 6-0’s in the family too so there were a few parties here and there. and how can i forget?? my mama has found herself a “friend,” honey. i’m just as pleased as punch about that one!!

with all that said, i’m still ready to sweep ol’ 2012 out the door and usher in this new year. i’m praying it’s a good one!

a Christmas of earrings, caramels and a red trash can

this year i told my husband that we should start a Christmas tradition. he said, in his ever present sarcasm, “we have one. i buy the tree and you decorate it.”

i’m not too convinced that that’s a tradition as much as a routine, but okay, dear! but what is a tradition is spending time with our family. lots of food and lots of laughter and good times to be had.

my dr. suess-y Christmas tree.
my dr. suess-y Christmas tree.

i have to admit that i was pretty dang tired on Christmas eve and Christmas because i had spent the days (and nights) before making a ridiculous amount of caramels and plenty jewelry to give as gifts to my family and friends. next year i’ll start much earlier. i usually do, but i guess this year i wanted to feel a little fire under my butt. or something like that.

beaded necklace
a beaded necklace for my mama
handpainted earrings
handpainted earrings for my fly girls

and once the fire started, i couldn’t stop!! let me just say, there’s nothing like putting on some music (thank you, pandora!!) and gettin’ your creative thang on.

orange tassels
orange tassels
earring assortment
earrings for e’erybody!!
handpainted earrings
ode to my ol’ school heart.

the kick-off to our Christmas happened where it always does, at my pop and stepmama’s on Christmas eve. this year we did a dollar store exchange which was pretty cool. well, it was cool to open your gift. it wasn’t, however, all that fun trying to find ONE GIFT for each person at the dollar store. it was my stepmama’s idea. i told her next year, i’m just making stuff.

on Christmas we were off to my mother-in-law’s early where her two small children were crazy excited about their new toys and i watched as my sis-in-law nearly passed out from blowing up a sumo bumper bopper. i jest, but i was a bit concerned that she’d eventually need oxygen. that evening, we headed to spend the evening with my mama, grandma and a host of other folks. i have to say, my grandma, bless her heart, gave us the most memorable gift ever…

bathroom accessory kit
bathroom accessory kit

and it’s RED!!! haha!! we all got a good laugh from this one, even though i think it was meant to be a totally serious gift. i asked my grandma, “but why red? my bathroom isn’t red??” she said, “look over there at that Christmas tree…everything goes with red.”

well, true that grandma.

anyway, i hope that you and yours had a very Merry Christmas!!!

 

 

 

 

 

love them

my little family and i recently went downtown to check out the martin luther king, jr. national memorial. yes, we live in the dc area and it took us this daggone long to drive about 20 minutes away to see it.

wack, i know.

anyway, it was a beautiful day, dutch had his skateboard, my husband had his usual silliness poppin’ and a good time was had by all.

dc's west potomac park
dc’s west potomac park
dc's west potomac park
dc’s west potomac park
mlk memorial dc
mlk memorial dc
mlk memorial dc
mlk memorial dc
martin luther king, jr. national memorial in dc
martin luther king, jr. national memorial in dc

after avoiding accidents with dutch and his skateboard vs. various downtown visitors we strolled through the franklin d. roosevelt memorial.

family

me and the husband
me and the husband
franklin d. roosevelt memorial in dc
franklin d. roosevelt memorial in dc
my little family
my little family
west potomac park dc
west potomac park dc

 

never been a football fan ’til now

football. i’ve never been a fan of the sport. never paid any attention to any particular team, never cared who made it to the playoffs. at high school football games i chatted up my girlfriends the entire time and barely glanced over at the field. when i got older and hung out at sports bars with friends it was mainly just to socialize. for me, anyway.

i wouldn’t know a cornerback from the quarterback. a tight end from a wide receiver. as a matter of fact, i just found out recently how many points a team gets for a touchdown.

superbowl? child, please… surely, there’s something else on besides these grown men in tight pants barreling each other down and chasing a ball up and down a field.

but now that dutch is playing, everything has changed. i’m HYPE!! you hear me?? i’m all into some football.

i’m sure i’ve driven my husband nuts with all my crazy football questions like, “wait, did the coach just say they can grab ankles in a tackle?? that’s allowed??!!”

dutch and my husband looking over in my direction.

dutch played his first game last weekend and there i was yelling at the top of my lungs up and down the sidelines, as if i really knew what the heck i was talking about.

well, yelling and half listening to other parents comment on the game so maybe i could learn a thing or two.

all i know for sure is if the other team has the ball, we need to tackle whoever is running with it to stop him. and if we have the ball we need to be getting to the goal line.

it is called a goal line, right?

clearly, the correct wording doesn’t matter to a mama cheering for her son and his team. shoot, i still don’t know offense from defense. didn’t realize until someone informed me that when i kept yelling to that child last saturday to keep running the ball that he actually couldn’t because he had gotten a flag for some reason unbeknownst me.

all i know is that when the coach has the kids in a huddle and he’s yelling, “how y’all feel?” and the kids shout back, “FIRED UP!!” i’m feeling pretty fired up too. excited about this sport that i never would’ve imagined in a million years that i’d be amped about.

no, i really don’t know what the heck is going on, but what i do know is dutch’s first game was the best game i’ve ever seen. and i can’t wait until the next one.

boom!!

dirty

football practice pants. they get pretty daggone filthy with all that mud, dirt and grass stained all over them. i’m sure they’re funky too. i wouldn’t know because when i’m carrying them to the washing machine i tend to keep them an arm’s distance away from my nose.

one day recently before practice, i handed dutch his bright and sparkly white football pants (thanks to my handy dandy stain stick) and he said to me, “mom, you washed them??” ummmm, yeah. then he added, “they’re supposed to be dirty.”

hmmm…i guess that’s item #174 on my list of things i don’t know about football. the pants are supposed to be dirty. check!

 

earth, wind & fire :: september

dutch just discovered earth, wind & fire a few months ago and there for a minute he was requesting to hear them every day. one of his absolute favorites is “september”! one day recently after summer camp he told me a teacher caught him singing an ewf song and shocked that my kid was a little bit of an old school head, he asked, “dutch, are you singing earth, wind & fire??” haha!

i love it.

this one is for you, dutchie!

ba de ya, say do you remember/ba de ya, dancing in september/ba de ya, never was a cloudy day…

happy 7th birthday, dutchie!

i was a writer before this blog. i know, i know…you can barely tell from all of my typos, grammatical errors, run-on sentences and my obsession with ellipsis. but anyway, after leaving my editorial gig several years ago i was struggling to find my creative self. i mean, majorly struggling! i was a new wife, a new mama, not writing professionally anymore. it was like a tornado had come in and swept through my life and switched things up. only it was a sweet tornado, you know, like a funnel of skittles and cotton candy and strawberry sauce. but still, nothing looked the same anymore.

then i discovered blogging and what do you know, my dutchie had given me a reason to write again. i never intended to be a “mom blogger,” and still don’t describe myself that way. i’ve always just been a writer whose beat, if you will, happened to be her own child. and, of course, any other thing that strikes my fancy.

and why not write about dutch? this boy is crazy funny and witty and super smart and curious and picky beyond belief. he’s honest (too honest, almost – he got that from his dad) and stubborn (all me right there!) and so daggone determined. he’s his own person with his own definitive tastes and likes and dislikes and cannot be swayed. he’s much like his brother in that way and i love that about the both of them.

dutch can be so caring and ultra loving and sweeter than cherry pie in one minute and then drive me completely insane with his strong-willed spirit of steel in the next. this child is the exact opposite of what i imagined he’d be (and i’m sure my husband will agree! haha…), yet his personality has been the most beautiful surprise ever.

i wouldn’t dare try to pin down what i think he’ll be when he grows up, but i’m sure whatever it is he’s gonna be great at it.

happy 7th birthday, dutchie!! i’m sure you’ve got plenty more ways up your sleeve to surprise us.